Live & Die Young
by Bunni English
Summary: Royai. What happens when the Flame Alchemist falls in love? What happens when he is subject to a weird case of paranoia and no one believes him? What if he really has gone over the edge?
1. Colonel KnockOut Mustang

**Disclaimer: I did not create and do not own FullMetal Alchemist. I do not own the characters, setting, or time period.**

**So, this is my first work of FanFiction. It will be a Royai, along with other characters and maybe a little Ed & Winry. Enjoy!**

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><p><strong>Roy<strong>

God, what had happened?

Everything was blurry and messed up. Roy imagined that this was what hell was like. Blurry and painful.

Oh god...what the hell was going on?

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><p>"Sir? Colonel Mustang?" Hawkeye asked, looking over Roy with worried eyes. Roy liked the way she looked when she did that. It made him feel like she really was worried, because usually she would pull out a gun when she had that type of expression.<p>

"Yes Hawkeye? What is it?" He asked in the most serious tone he could manage, being on the floor and everything.

"Are you all right, sir?" She asked. Roy's brow furrowed.

"Uh...tell me what happened and I'll give you the results." He offered, smiling weakly. Hawkeye sighed, holding out a hand. Roy took it and Hawkeye pulled him to his feet. "Thank you." He said, dusting himself off. Hawkeye smiled.

"Your welcome, sir." She said, saluting him. Roy smiled.

"Now, will you please tell me what happened?" He asked, looking around. Edward Elric stood off to the side, smiling weakly and rubbing the back of his neck. Roy narrowed his eyes. "Something tells me it had to do with _you, _FullMetal." Roy guessed. Hawkeye gave Edward a knowing smile. Roy would make Ed's life a living hell.

"Uh, yeah, Colonel. It...kind of did..." Edward said quietly, giving Roy a sheepish smile. Al cowered next to him, watching Roy's every move. Roy's eyebrows raised.

"What did you do, FullMetal?" He asked. Edward didn't answer. "As your commander, I give the order you _tell me_ what the heck you did!" Roy snapped, geting angry. Hawkeye tsked.

"I would do what he says, Elric." She sighed, turning to walk back to her own desk. Edward was sweating. Roy grinned evily.

"I...I...I-I pissed you off, and you attacked me, and it was self defense, and I knocked you out, and your Hawkeye there tried to shoot me." Edward stammered, cowering at his last word. Roy scowled.

"What the hell?" He said, starting to laugh. Edward watched him like he was crazy, and Al started shaking. Hawkeye just shook her head.

All the memories were coming back now. Roy's gloves getting wet; getting mad at Edward. Knocking _himself_ out by trying to ignite his wet gloves. Dammit, that was _funny_. Roy calmed down, then turned and walked back to his desk.

"And, may I ask, why were you in here in the first place?" Roy asked after taking a sip of his coffee, which was still hot. Edward smiled.

"We thought we'd stop by before we left for Central." He said. Roy nodded.

"You better be careful out there, Elric. I'm still not open to you being killed any time soon." Roy said with a wicked smile.

"Wouldn't dream of it, sir!" Edward gushed, before walking out with Al close behind. Hawkeye shook her head.

"You should keep a careful watch on those boys, sir." She advised. Roy sat back in his chair and nodded.

"I swear, those boys will be the death of me." Roy said, closing his eyes. Hawkeye nodded. He sighed, then opened his eyes and turned back to his work. He scowled down at the paperwork. He hated filling out forms and applications all the time.

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><p>"Good morning, Colonel." Hawkeye said as she walked in the next morning.<p>

"Good morning Hawkeye." Roy said with a nod, still absorbed in his paperwork. Hawkeye smiled. The phone rang, and Hawkeye picked it up.

"Lieutenant Riza Hawkeye of East City, Colonel Roy Mustang's Office, speaking. Hello? Yes Hughes, he is here. Colonel?" Hawkeye said, looking over at Roy. Roy sighed and picked up the line.

"Hello Hughes. What do you want?" He asked.

"Oh, someone hasn't had their coffee this morning! Hey Roy, how are you?" Hughes said happily. Roy rolled his eyes.

"No time to talk Hughes. Please, just spit it out so I can get my work done." Roy said. The other end was silent. "Hughes?" Roy turned to Hawkeye. "I think he hung up..." He said. Hawkeye smiled.

"You can be a bit intimidating, sir. Even over the phone." She admitted. Roy scowled.

"You could have told me sooner, I could have used it to my advantage."

"Oh, you already do, sir."

Silence.

"Sir?"

"Why don't you tell me certain things?" Roy asked in an accusing tone of voice. Hawkeye shrugged.

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><p>Roy stood up and stretched. It had been a very long day, and he couldn't wait to go home and sleep.<p>

"Good night, sir." Hawkeye said, grabbing her coat from its hook by the door.

"Wait, Hawkeye. I'll walk out with you." Roy said, grabbing his hat, coat, and gloves. Hawkey smiled. The two of them walked out of the building, said good bye, and went their own ways. Hawkeye called for a taxi, and Roy walked back to his apartment. It was a cold, clear night. Winter had just set in and the first signs of frost were appearing in the grass. Roy pulled his coat over his uniform, rubbing his hands togather to keep warm. His breath turned to steam in the air; swirling away from him like smoke.

Roy unlocked his apartment door, and walked inside, locking the door behind him. The study's light was on, and so was the bedroom's and kitchen's as well. Roy couldn't remember leaving the lights on, it seemed like years ago. The mail had been slipped under the door, and he picked it up. It seemed Edward and Al Elric had made it to Central ok.

Roy walked into the kitchen and placed the mail on the table. He shed his coat, gloves, and hat on the couch and moved toward the sink to get a glass of water. He drank three glasses, then splashed his face with cold water before turning off the kitchen light and going into his study. He always had more work to do... Roy sat down at his desk and starting working. Aroung 10:37 PM a crash sounded from the kitchen. Roy rubbed his eyes and stretched. So much for a goodnight sleep. At this rate, he would never get to bed.

Roy walked into the kitchen and turned the lights on. His glass was shattered on the floor. He sighed and swept up the broken glass and dumped it in the trash. Roy got another glass, drank another three cups, replaced the cup in the cabinet, turned off the lights, and returned to his study. The door slammed shut behind him. He grabbed his alchemist gloves from the desk. Was it just him, or was he being paranoid? Or was he hallucinating? Roy turned. Nope. The door was shut. Roy tried to open it, but it wouldn't budge.

He sighed. Great. Just great.

"Damn apartment." Roy muttered. Something hard hit him in the bad of the head. Roy turned. Nothing. "What the hell...?" He said, this time louder. He could use a drink. A real one. Or maybe that would make it worse? Roy was so tired he couldn't think straight, but he forced himself to focus. Something else hit him in the back of the head, and Roy turned and sent a trail of flames out that disappeared in the air after a few moments of being suspended in the air.

"Show yourself!" Roy ordered.

"Ok." A hoarse voice said. Something hit Roy in the back of the head and he collapsed onto the floor.

Nope. Still nothing.

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><p><strong>I hope you liked it! I hope to update it soon!<strong>


	2. Despair of the Crazy Creatures

**Here goes for Chapter 2! Enjoy!**

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><p><strong>Roy<strong>

Roy's head hurt. _Alot._ Whatever had hit him had had good aim.

His alarm clock went off in the bedroom and Roy sighed. It was 4 O'clock. If he had been in bed he would have gotten up, but Roy was on the ground and he didn't want to get up. But the ringing was really annoying.

Roy got up and went into the bedroom to turn off the stupid clock. When he did the apartment was silent, even for Roy, who went home just to _have _the silence. It was creepy.

He changed his shirt, then went into the kitchen to get some coffee. Roy got a glass and poured some coffee into it, then slowly drank the content, which was cold. God, he would just wait until he got back to base to have coffee, like he usually did. He left his cup of cold coffee on the counter and returned to his study, or, what was left of it. Papers and files were everywhere, his chair had been knocked over, books had been pulled off the shelves, the cabinets had been overturned. The study looked like a tornado had hit it.

Roy rubbed his forehead. Just another headache. He would have to clean it up that evening, after he got back from that day's work. Great.

He returned to the kitchen and poured the remainder of his coffee down the drain, then grabbed his things and headed for the door. Roy's head still hurt, and he really wanted to clean up his study. But he knew if he didn't show up to do his work, Hawkeye would shoot him.

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><p>"Good morning, Colonel." Hawkeye said as Roy walked into his office.<p>

"Yes, as good a morning as it can be." Roy said softly, grimacing. Hawkeye looked up from her paperwork.

"Did you say something, sir?" She asked. Roy shook his head and went to his desk, picking through a pile of files before sitting down. He sighed. He had never thought he would hate paperwork so much. He picked up a pen and began to fill out the small-worded papers. Being a Colonel was not as easy as everyone thought. Dammit, it wasn't worth the stress Roy had for it; and yet he was alwayse stressed over work. Why? Because he didn't have a life otherwise. He practically _lived _at base. When he wasn't working there he was working in his study at home. He barley did anything but work. Man, his life was messed up, even if it was so he could reach his goals. The Military had very high standards. Roy knew.

Mustang massaged his forehead while he worked, trying to ease his headache.

"Are you ok, sir?"

Roy looked up.

"Yes. Thank you, Hawkeye." He said, giving his most trusting smile. Riza pushed her chair back as if to walk over to him. "I am ok. Really." Roy continued. How was it that Riza Hawkeye seemed to know everything? It made everything dramatic, the way she knew what was going on. It also creeped the heck out of Mustang.

"Are you sure?" She asked again, giving him a worried glance. Roy nodded.

"Now, as an order, I tell you to get back to work, Hawkeye!" He growled. He hated being harsh, but it was the only way Riza would stop asking him if he was ok.

Riza stubbornly sat back down and returned to her work, but kept looking over at Roy to check on him every now and then. Roy sighed.

"Hey, colonel! We came back!" Edward Elric said, walking into the office with Al.

"How was your time in central, FullMetal? It's only been four days." Mustang said quietly, leaning back in his chair. Edward shrugged.

"Good, I guess. After talking to Hughes for three hours straight without getting a word in, I guess I decided I missed you, Colonel." He said, smiling. Mustang laughed.

"Is that it, Elric?" Something was nagging at him, but Roy couldn't put his finger on it..._Hughes. _He stood up suddenly. "Hawkeye, get Hughes on the phone for me!" He said, turning back to the Elric brothers. They looked at him, Edward with a startled expression.

"Is everything ok, Colonel?" Al asked quietly from where he stood behind Edward. Roy sighed. Oh, how he wished he knew. Something was weird about it all, but he just couldn't figure out what it was. Hawkeye looked over at him and nodded. He picked up the phone.

"Hughes?"

"Mustang! How goes it?" Hughes voice said from the other end.

"Hughes, I have no time for your chatter. Why did you call me yesterday?" He demanded. There was a startled silence at the other end.

"I have sad news, Roy." His voice was defeated, sad sounding.

"What is it?" He asked, his voice softening.

"There was a murder...in Central. A solider found dead in an alley; its been found that this is a new threat. I suggest you keep careful watch, Roy." Hughes said. Roy scowled.

"Thank you for the information." He said, hanging up. Hawkeye, Edward, and Al looked at him expectantly.

"So..." Edward started quietly.

"There has recently been a murder in Central, a solider. The cause of death brings the men of Central to believe it could be a new threat. It was a warning." Mustang explained. Hawkeye looked at her hands. Al and Edward were silent.

"Whats going to happen?" Hawkeye asked after a moment. Mustang shook his head. Hawkeye understood and turned away.

Edward watched Roy closely, who seemed to act as if the murder was the end of the world...and he was giving in.

"Damn you, Colonel! Are you just going to sit here and wait around for something to happen?" Edward snapped, pointing an accusing finger at Mustang. He glared at Edward.

"You damn idiot, thats the only thing we can do! Just because, I; you are an alchemist, doesn't mean we can rush off and save everybody. It doesn't work that way!" He snapped back, glaring. Hawkeye let out a breath, and closed her eyes. Edward was steaming.

"Yeah, well, you can try!" He said, turning to go. Roy grabbed his arm.

"No. As your officer I give you the order to stand down, FullMetal. Be happy I don't send you out onto the battlefield, Elric!" He said. Edward pulled away, and scowled at Roy. He hated the damn Colonel. He was an idiot. Roy and Ed met gazes, and Edward suddenly realized what it was all about. Roy nodded slowly, and Edward returned it with a quick nod. "Dismissed." Mustang said, turning back to his desk.

Edward and Al departed, leaving Hawkeye and Roy alone in the office. Hawkeye glanced at Roy, then shook her head. It was crazy what the alchemists did.

'Yes,' She thought 'Alchemists are crazy creatures.'


	3. Stress

**Third Chapter!**

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><p><strong>Hawkeye<strong>

'This is weird,' Hawkeye thought, watching Roy shuffle through the papers on his desk. She had never seen him so nervous, so...unprepared. Hawkeye was one of the only people who had experienced Roy's desk when he was stressed out. She tried to imagine what Roy's desk looked like at home.

"...Uh. Hawkeye? My second application?" Hawkeye had spaced out for a moment, and she looked up at Roy.

"I'm sorry; what, sir?" She said, shuffling through stacks of papers.

"My second application for Central? I need another copy." He stated for a second time. Hawkeye handed him a sheet of paper and smirked.

"Did you loose your other one?" She asked. Roy sighed and nodded. Actually, if he was correct, it was somewhere in his study along with the rest of his paperwork. Not lost, just not where he needed it to be. Hawkeye watched Roy sit back down at his desk and continue to work. She never realized how fragile his sanity was, just like everyone else's. So being an alchemist didn't make you stronger on the emotional side. She sighed.

Roy looked over at her and she returned to her work, filling out papers. It was a boring job, but it evened out her gun time. More gun use, more paperwork. Made her want to quite the Military every now and then, but the job was worth it. Being an inferior to Roy in his division was just the first part of her payment. She wouldn't leave him. Ever.

"Um, Hawkeye? Hawkeye!" Once again she was snapped out of a daydream.

"Oh, sorry Colonel." She said, rubbing her forehead. He sighed. "Whats wrong, sir?" She asked, looking up at him. He just shook his head.

"Nothing you need to worry about, Hawkeye." He said, tapping her paperwork with a pen. "You have enough to deal with as it is." Hawkeye frowned. Did she really think work was going to distract her from him? Something was really wrong. Usually it was Hawkeye who told _Roy _to do his work, not the other way around.

She shook her head.

"As long as I'm with you, I'll always have things to worry about." She commented before returning to her work. Roy was silent, and she wondered if he had taken her words the wrong way. She hoped he hadn't, because that would just be another mess to clean up if he had.

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><p><strong>Roy<strong>

He was very stressed, but he wouldn't show it. He knew Hawkeye would tell by the way he was shuffling through papers, the way he kept losing things, and his messy desk. Roy sighed. He really wanted to know what Hawkeye had meant. He hoped it was the good, compliment comment; not the insulting, I don't want to be here comment. Hawkeye just wasn't like that.

They were both jittery. They couldn't help it. Thats what happened in the Military when someone called in a report, you want to get out there. This reminded him of Edward, who seemed to follow that instinct. 'He just has to learn.' Roy thought.

Mustang still remembered his younger days in the Military. He had learned everything the hard way. In the Military, there was only one way: the hard way. And thats what Roy saw in Edward. Him. And he knew someone had better get that boy to learn it, the hard way, or he would burn his ass the next time he did something like that. He would have done it himself, but Roy was getting sick of playing babysitter for the immature lot of his division. Ed could take care of himself.

For now.

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><p><strong>Edward<strong>

"Man, that was crazy." Edward said, walking alongside his brother down the hallway. Al nodded.

"Yeah, it was. What was that all about, anyway?" He asked. Ed shrugged.

"No clue, but it must have been pretty bad for Colonel Mustang to act like that."

"He wasn't angry." Al commented. Ed looked up at him.

"Ha ha. Right, Al." In Ed's book, Roy was worth avoiding unless you needed something or he was your commanding officer. Both came up alot, so Ed never really got a chance to avoid him. But, he had to admit, he could be pretty cool too. Being the Flame Alchemist...was pretty big.

Edward had always wondered what Roy had been like when he was a kid. Probably quiet and serious, rounding off at a cuss word here and there. Ed smiled at his idea. He looked up at Al.

"Hey, we're going to be staying here until Colonel Mustang gives us permission to leave. When we do, he can trust us not to to anything stupid, right?" He asked him. Al nodded. Edward smiled. "Good."


	4. Paranoid

**Hey, sorry this chapter took so long. I've been busy, and when I had the time I was either really tired or suffering from the cursed writers block. Well, I hope you enjoy this next part. Hoping for some reviews!**

**And, I would like to inform you, I have no idea where I am going with this story. -_-***

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><p><strong>Roy<strong>

The study was stil a mess, and Roy was becoming a little paranoid. When he had first walked into his apartment he could have sworn there was someone in the kitchen with the lights on, but when he made it to the doorway the lights were off and nobody was there. He rubbed his eyes. He really needed to get some sleep, but he had promised himself he would clean up the study. He wished he had known how late it would be when he got back. Around 10.

He hadn't seen Edward and Al since that morning, and from what one of the soliders said, they had left base around 7. Roy didn't want to worry about them, but he couldn't help but see that they had not followed his orders. When he had brought it up with Hawkeye, she had said he had never told them to stay at base. Roy grimaced at the thought.

He started picking up the papers and putting them in three neat stacks on the desk, in order of importance. The most important pile was very big. Then he put the books back on the shelves, turned his chair back the way it was, and straightened the cabinets and replaced all the files. It was past midnight before he was finished. The moment he finished he went into his room and dropped onto the bed and fell asleep.

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><p>It was a horrible Friday morning at base, simply said.<p>

"Where is the file for the exchange in Central, Hawkeye?" Roy asked for the fourth time.

"On your desk, sir." She replied, pointing to the red file on his desk.

"Oh, thank you." He said.

"You're welcome, sir." She said for the sixth time. Roy nodded as he looked through the papers. He still hadn't told anyone about the "break in" to his apartment, the invasion to the only place he thought couldn't be invaded. Damn, nothing was private anymore.

Mustang looked over the folder, rubbing his forehead where a headache ached. He sighed. Damn paperwork, he still thought that if he had known about all of this when he was in training he wouldn't have tried so hard. Yet, he had to accomplish what he had started. It was his duty; his job to make sure everyone was protected. Damn, it was hard, but it was worth it.

He would win this game if it cost him his life, but he played well, and was good on the battlefield. There was no need to give up when he had come so far; no need to substitue his life for a simple game piece. But not all pieces were simple to him. It all went down to strategy.

Roy sighed again. He had lost his concentration. Damn.

The phone rang. Roy picked it up.

"Colonel Roy Mustang speaking." He said. Hawkeye looked up, curious.

"Hey Roy! I have an update on the murder here, thought you'd want to hear." Hughes said happily into the phone. Roy sometimes wondered how he had gotten a wife and hadn't ended up gay.

"Well, spit it out, then!" He commanded, looking down at the file in his hand.

"We got a lead. A powerful person, this one is. We found another murdered." He reported. Roy moved the phone to his other ear.

"Is that it, Hughes? That doesn't help me at all. Anyway, I'm over here. _Not _in Central. I really can't help you." Mustang informed Hughes, exasperated.

"Well, anyway. Different cause of death this time." Hughes continued like he hadn't heard Roy's comment.

"Oh? How did the first one die anyway?"

"The first one had a gun wound to the back of the head, this one was ripped apart." He supplied quietly. Roy shrugged. He didn't see how this was a 'lead' to the case he wasn't even working on. Or was he? He shuffled through the papers on his desk to make sure the case file hadn't been covered by his other documents. No. No case file. He sighed.

"Yeah, so? Listen Hughes, I don't have time for this, ok? Call back when you have real information." Roy said, hanging up. Damn fool, wasting his time. Hawkeye smiled at him then returned to her work. That reminded him of his own work and he turned back to the files on his desk.

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><p><strong>Edward<strong>

Edward smiled at Al as they walked back down to Colonel Roy's office.

"Go ahead, boys. I think he is expecting you." Hawkeye told them, looking up from her desk as they walked in. Edward nodded at her and opened up the doors. Ed had always thought Mustang's office had been a bit messy. He always seemed a little disorganized, unprepared. Then there he was, burning your ass if you didn't do something the way he wanted it. Edward knew from experience Roy always had a new trick. Always.

"Hello FullMetal. What brings you to my office this afternoon?" Roy asked, smirking from his seat behind his desk. Dang, he looked commanding.

"Uh, nothing Colonel. Just, checking in, sir." Edward admitted with a shrug. Al nodded. Roy sat back in his chair and smiled.

"Ah, I see. Or is it your curious manner that brought you here; huh, shrimp?" He asked with a questionable grin on wether it was good or just plain evil. Ed grimaced. Why the hell did Roy act like that all the time?

"Don't call me a shrimp!" He demanded, showing a gloved fist. Mustang laughed.

"Well, fine, FullMetal. If all you came to do was 'check in' with your orders, then you can leave. I have work to finish." He said, standing up. Ed glared at Roy before turning and walking out. Al followed, as quiet as ever. Hawkeye could sense their anger and looked up as they passed. She knew enough to not ask them what had happened, so instead she stood up and walked into Roy's office.

"Is everything ok, sir?" She asked, looking around.

"Yes, everything is fine." Roy said, sitting back down. Riza nodded and returned to her own desk.

The real reason the Elrics had gone to see Roy was to check in on their orders _and _see if they could learn anything about the murders.

A strange feeling crept over Ed as they walked away, and he turned to look behind him to make sure no one was there.

_'Why am I being so paranoid?' _He asked himself, shivering. He would soon find out.


End file.
